Cursebreaker | 36 - The Fey Trader
Last time on curse breaker. We made it to the great Bismite stone after Holly had an ethereal experience that took her all the way to Vindorn and back. Later on, as we set up camp beneath the great crystal, we were approached by the golden dragon for the 3rd time. In order to prove himself to the dragon, Snack presented his white lotus flower and it worked. With barely a word, the dragon enchanted snack with a dragon mark, causing him to become taller, stronger, and half golden.
Tim / GM:After another full day of travel, we find ourselves at an elaborate trading post, and a sexy elf man just gave us each little wooden tokens. Neat. So, yeah, all of that really did happen. You are all standing in front of this 3 story building with several outbuildings and, like, extra wings to it. It's all, made out of, like, wood, and it's got sort of, curved, like steepled roofs.
Tim / GM:This, fast on his feet, elf boy, has traveled from the upper balcony to outside to greet all of you and has handed you these little wooden tokens. They're about the size of a credit card. It's just a flat piece of wood with a little marking that doesn't make much sense.
Speaker 2:Is it like the bath tokens in Spirited Away?
Tim / GM:Yes. Exactly. Awesome. Yep. The, elf man is, wearing this open shirt, and, he's got this muscled chest and a kind of beautiful face, actually.
Tim / GM:He's got a little bit of violet to the color in his eyes. He, looks up at each of you with these long eyelashes and says, welcome all of you to the Fey Trader. I'm excited and curious to see what you'll spend your tokens on.
Hannah / Eryn:Hello, Holly says to this very, attractive elf who in my Hannah mind is gonna look like Lipace. Oh. Yes. Is this brand
Tara / Journey:new? Like Can he look like Lee Pace, though?
Hannah / Eryn:Can he look exactly like Lee Pace? So he looks like Lee Pace? Dolly Pace. Yes. His last name can it be Dolly Pace, please?
Hannah / Eryn:Pace. Please, Lord. Just let me laugh this one dream to him.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry, Tim.
Speaker 5:I already have one.
Tim / GM:He, stands up from his deep bow and, smiles at each of you, and he says, my name is Dolly Pace, and I'm happy to be of service to each and every one of you.
Hannah / Eryn:Hello, Dolly. Lovely to meet you. And, Holly offers, Dolly her her hand.
Tim / GM:Yeah. I think he, like, takes it and, like, does another bow and kisses your hand and meets your eyes again.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly giggles.
Speaker 5:Is this custom here? We all have to do this?
Speaker 6:Not that I'm aware of. Okay. Good. I don't
Tim / GM:He looks around at the circle and says, any other takers? Very well. You may use our, establishment at your leisure. One of these tokens will let you into one of our 4 very special areas. Feel free to explore within.
Tim / GM:We have reasonable accommodations for a more reasonable price, but if you wish to procure more tokens, just seek me.
Hannah / Eryn:Where where exactly, would we be able to find you, Dolly?
Tim / GM:Oh, I'll be around or you can ring the bell on the 1st floor and I'll find you.
Hannah / Eryn:Okay. Sounds good. Nice to meet you.
Speaker 5:Mister Pace, can you tell us about the different areas in the store or should we just go see for ourselves?
Tim / GM:He says, for every standard amenity you would expect to find at such an establishment, we have a, special version of that. If you're seeking a meal, we've got a room for luxury meals. If you're seeking a bed, we've got rooms for luxury beds. A luxury bath? We've got that.
Tim / GM:And if you wish to go beyond the bed and bath, you can take a look at our expansive third floor, where we offer a bevy of magical items
Speaker 2:And if we wanted more tokens
Tim / GM:Well, you would just seek me to purchase them.
Speaker 2:Right. How much would they be?
Tim / GM:For you, right now, 50 gold.
Speaker 2:I don't even know if I want more.
Tim / GM:Okay. Well, I hope you all have a fantastic stay. And I'm sure I'll see you all again.
Speaker 5:Thank you, mister Dolly.
Hannah / Eryn:Thank you.
Tim / GM:He just gives you, like, a little smirk, and he says, very good. I'll see you all inside. And he kind of goes out and starts mingling with people that are around these bonfires outside?
Speaker 2:Wanna go in?
Hannah / Eryn:Should we, like, go into a space together to make sure this isn't a murder house first?
Speaker 2:I wanna say hi to Rin before we go in.
Hannah / Eryn:Okay. Yeah. Let's go say hi.
Tim / GM:So, yeah, Rin, hasn't noticed you. He's, seated at a bonfire with some other people. It looks like he is he might be alone. He might be associated with something.
Speaker 2:Sneak up
Tim / GM:on him. Okay. Nice. Yeah. Give me a stealth check.
Speaker 2:Natural one.
Hannah / Eryn:Well, we're all with you, so we're all just, like, chatting and then getting,
Tara / Journey:like, a You're, like, sneaking up and all the rest
Tim / GM:of us
Tara / Journey:are, like, shuffling around.
Speaker 2:I hit, like, a pile of crunchy leaves.
Tim / GM:Yeah. What do you do to, like, sneak up on him and surprise him?
Speaker 2:I was gonna poke him in the rib area.
Tim / GM:Okay. You
Speaker 2:know, the annoying thing.
Tim / GM:Yeah. So you you get close to him and sneak up behind him. And, you can see he's just, like, nodding his head and listening to a story that somebody else is telling. And you, kind of, like, spread your arms to give him a poke under the ribs, and right when you, like, jab in on him, you just feel your fingers crunch against the force field, and you just get, like, blasted back 5 feet and skid across the dirt. And he, like, gets up and turns around, and he says, hi, Oli.
Speaker 2:Why? How do you do this every time?
Tim / GM:Do you even know how heavy your footsteps are?
Speaker 2:Well, I mean, I'm not that heavy. I'm so light on my feet. Right, Tibio?
Speaker 6:Yes.
Tim / GM:Okay. At that, he's gonna try to make a trip attack on you with his, with his shepherd's crook.
Speaker 2:What do I
Tim / GM:Yes. You you can test it with a, I think a a strength or dexterity would work in this case.
Speaker 2:17.
Tim / GM:Nat 20. Damn it. Why? So right when you say you're steady on your feet, he, gets his shepherd's cook right around your ankles and just yanks it and drops you to the ground.
Speaker 2:Oh, every time
Tara / Journey:I jump out of
Hannah / Eryn:the way.
Tim / GM:Have you been practicing at all?
Speaker 2:Yeah. Definitely. We've been we've
Speaker 6:been dealing with some conflict. Only has not had time to practice.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. Yeah. We've been helping some revolutions, forming governments, blowing up water towers, you know, saving people stuff. Hero stuff.
Tim / GM:Okay. Not bad. That's a good use of your time, I think. But tell me, have you had any more, accidents?
Hannah / Eryn:I mean,
Speaker 2:no. Nothing disastrous. I mean, there was the tower that exploded.
Speaker 5:It was due for repairs.
Hannah / Eryn:There was a time you turned into the sheep, and then you turned into butterflies.
Speaker 6:There were extenuating circumstances, both of those times.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I'm getting I'm getting better.
Tim / GM:Listen. I think you could probably use another lesson if you got time for it.
Speaker 2:Yeah. We'll be here for a little bit.
Tim / GM:Good.
Speaker 5:Hey. What's good here, Rin?
Tim / GM:To eat.
Speaker 2:What's good, Rin?
Tim / GM:He says, depends how much money you've got. What'd you bring with you?
Speaker 5:Well, I have this wooden token.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Well, if you're hungry, I'd spend it on the, luxury room in the restaurant on the main floor.
Speaker 5:I can also use a nice bath.
Tim / GM:Well, that's on the second floor.
Speaker 5:But I also need some good magic items.
Tim / GM:Okay. Well, I already spent my token. So if you're looking for another one, I don't have it
Hannah / Eryn:for you. Well Alright. Alright. It was nice to see you meet you, Wren.
Tim / GM:I don't know that I've really met any of you except for Uli.
Hannah / Eryn:Oh. Yeah. I'm Holly, Holly Hyacinth. Pleasure to meet you. And Holly offers her hand the same way she did to, Dolly, the elf earlier.
Tim / GM:He he gives you a high five with the back of his hand on the back of your hand.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly laughs and is like, okay. Yeah. That's fine.
Tim / GM:And he points at, Holly and Burns says, you 2 are from Tildrey. Right? I remember at the court case.
Speaker 5:Yes. I believe you were present for my trial.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Yeah. Mhmm. Well, seems like you did okay.
Speaker 5:Still here.
Hannah / Eryn:Not in jail, so we're doing great.
Tim / GM:And I definitely remember the 2 of you pointing to scallion bones. But is this and he kinda, like, leans into Uli and does the, like, hand on the side of his mouth, and he's, is this the same dragon thing as before?
Speaker 2:Yeah. He, went through puberty. Had a grosper.
Tara / Journey:He is crawling very fast, and, Tivio is gonna pat him on the shoulder.
Tim / GM:And, how how have you all been?
Speaker 7:Snack has grown much. Yes.
Tim / GM:Is he a real dragon?
Speaker 2:We don't know yet.
Speaker 5:Check back with us in a couple of weeks, I think.
Tim / GM:I'm gonna have everybody make a real quick perception check.
Hannah / Eryn:Perception. 19 plus 1 is 20.
Speaker 5:8. 11.
Speaker 7:Okay. Got a 18 over here. Nice.
Tara / Journey:17. K.
Tim / GM:Wow. So 18 and up, notice that around this bonfire, is born. It was an old ally of Emrys. He was like the dwarven, presumably a cleric.
Speaker 7:Snack, is looking at him. Snack puts his claw on, Tibio and, points with his tail. Tibio. Do you recognize that man? I'll say that
Tim / GM:bumps into an 18 Tibio. Okay.
Tara / Journey:I squint at him for a moment because I was blinded by staring into the fire.
Speaker 6:Yes, Zack. That is the one who was with Emery, and we met him. Yes.
Speaker 7:Yes.
Speaker 6:He left Emery to die.
Speaker 7:Perhaps now we must exact vengeance upon him.
Speaker 6:No. No. No. That is not her job.
Speaker 7:Get get an apology then. Perhaps, this will be good practice for me, Tibia, and Holly and Bert, for me to be party leader as a dragon ordained upon me. Party leader.
Tim / GM:The dragon did say you were all followers of Snagno.
Tara / Journey:Tibia looks confused, but doesn't say anything.
Speaker 5:And no vengeance killing?
Speaker 7:I will practice this diplomacy that is important for dragons.
Hannah / Eryn:Well, Snack, just remember the last time you killed someone and what happened.
Speaker 7:Yes. He came back and there were no consequences. No. That is what I
Tara / Journey:recall. Yeah.
Tim / GM:I was promoted. Well
Hannah / Eryn:remember how you felt when you thought he was
Speaker 7:Oh, yes. Thank you, Holly. I will be very careful not to kill.
Hannah / Eryn:Well, you're a big strong dragon basically now, so you have to be extra careful.
Speaker 5:Thank you. Bert, reaches up to put a hand on Snack's shoulder, but can't reach it. So he kinda slaps him on
Tim / GM:the thigh.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. I think I
Speaker 5:think you can do it, buddy. Just be smart. And I cast guidance on him.
Tara / Journey:Nice.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly notices where Bert's touching. She's like, Snack, I think we can get you a new loincloth while we're here.
Speaker 7:Yes. I think that would be wise.
Hannah / Eryn:It's literally a triangle.
Tim / GM:Just enough.
Hannah / Eryn:Covering it. It's very small
Speaker 7:space. Ola Prochborn.
Tim / GM:Yeah. He kind of looks glassy eyed staring into the fire, and you can't tell if he's even paying attention to the story that's being told.
Speaker 7:What is this story?
Tim / GM:If somebody's just, like, detailing their their travels coming here, they followed the southern coastline to get here. But it's it seems like an energy vampire story about travel logistics.
Speaker 7:Snack starts to sit down, but, notices the shortness of his loincloth and stands up and leans against a a log. That's some traveling tale you have there. I once heard of another's travels. His name was Emery.
Tim / GM:He he pays attention to that. Yeah. Mhmm. Attacked.
Speaker 7:Yeah. So this Emery, he was a brave man, but was abandoned by his allies. Tragic, isn't it? You, good traveler, or did your allies support you?
Tim / GM:He's like really starting to squirm. He, still does not recognize you at all and he says, I know desde Emory. Really?
Speaker 7:Well, I am, arriving new to this spot. We've traveled far and I could certainly use a good story. Do you have any stories of Emery?
Tim / GM:The last time I saw him, he accompanied us into a cave. Inside the cave, we find goblins, too tall for goblins, too strong for goblins. We fought 2 of them with 4 of us, and we almost died. But Emri wanted to push deeper into the cave, and I could not do it. I we left him, and now we are haunted.
Speaker 7:Haunted, you say? In what ways?
Tim / GM:He sees that the circle has gone quiet. The person telling his boring story has stopped talking, and, he's got all eyes on him and he shifts. And he says, when I close my eyes, I see eyes staring back at me. A child dies with a terrible smile. It has driven us to madness.
Tim / GM:My compatriots and I have split up.
Speaker 7:Did you procure anything from this, adventure?
Tim / GM:I did not take anything.
Speaker 7:You should know that, Emery did not fare any better, unfortunately. He bears something from that day as well. What stopped you as you say?
Tim / GM:Fear of death? It was not something that Emery had.
Speaker 2:Are we all hearing this? Yeah. Could I just, like, quick check-in on where they are, Emery and Dave.
Tim / GM:Oh, yeah. So you guys went southeast. They went northwest. And so Dave's dot is just getting smaller and smaller in the distance.
Speaker 6:Okay.
Tim / GM:And it's like, it takes you a while to even find him. He's like a just like a tiny little spot of light.
Speaker 2:Ollie is radio silent
Tim / GM:right now.
Tara / Journey:It's like She's got one eyeball that's, like, going around.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Sorry. Brief intervention.
Speaker 7:If you were to see Emery again, what what would you say?
Tim / GM:I don't know that I could face him again. I did not think he would survive, and I am nervous to ever see him. I suppose I am haunted by him as well, haunted by my actions. But I think I have made up my mind. And he stands up.
Speaker 7:On what exactly?
Tim / GM:It's going to be a bath. And he shows you his token, and he starts walking inside.
Hannah / Eryn:Wow. That really cut the tension at the end there. That was good.
Speaker 5:I don't wanna do a bath if that guy's in there.
Speaker 7:Yeah. I think, vengeance killing is not the correct course of action.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. Definitely sounds He's
Tim / GM:like too few of you, turns around and looks at you.
Speaker 2:You're growing so much, Saks.
Speaker 7:I feel bad.
Hannah / Eryn:It was not a good situation they were in.
Speaker 6:I feel that one thing that we have learned, that we have seen, is that sometimes there are no bad guys, no good guys. Sometimes everyone just tries their best.
Speaker 2:And then there's Joe.
Speaker 5:So maybe there's one bad guy. Yeah.
Speaker 7:He described, being cursed, but I don't think he took anything from the cave as he said. It sounds like a curse. He sees what we saw within Holly's, whatever that is.
Hannah / Eryn:My historoscope? Yes. I think,
Speaker 2:also, that could just be trauma, seeing something awful when you close your eyes.
Speaker 5:Yeah. It does seem like this cave is bad news for anyone involved, even the people who didn't go in.
Hannah / Eryn:Didn't they tell us where the cave was before when we met them on the path to Hogwild?
Speaker 5:You're not thinking of going to that cave, are you, Holly?
Hannah / Eryn:No. I I guess part of me wonders if there's anything else that would help Emery, but he seems to be kinda doing okay right now. I mean, all for all we know.
Speaker 6:He has found a mission of sorts.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. I'm not necessarily going to seek it out, I guess, Tibio is what I'm saying.
Speaker 5:For me, we're gonna need a hell of a good reason to go in time. Yeah.
Speaker 2:It is kind of unsettling that it exists.
Hannah / Eryn:I don't know. With all this arcane magic thread stuff, there might be something there. That's all. Yeah. We'll see.
Speaker 5:And Holly,
Tim / GM:like, spaces out
Speaker 6:for a
Hannah / Eryn:second while she looks spaces out for a second while she looks around at all the threads in this area.
Speaker 5:But, guys, we're here at the Fae Trader. Let's relax. Stop thinking about eyeball caves.
Speaker 2:I wanna go shopping. So these tokens guarantee us a way in, but we have to pay for whatever we get in there? Or is it, like, you get off free?
Tim / GM:It it like, in the case of the bed, the meal, and the bath, like, it's, like, all inclusive. Of course, using it for access to the 3rd floor to look at magic items, you'd of course, have to buy the magic item. Damn it. Yeah.
Tara / Journey:It's a voucher for one of those things or access to that room. Yep.
Speaker 6:Okay.
Hannah / Eryn:My colleague's gonna go try to check out the food.
Speaker 7:Snack would like to go to the bath.
Hannah / Eryn:Wow. Snack.
Speaker 2:On a bath.
Speaker 5:What do you think Snack should should we make it a boys' bath?
Speaker 7:Yes. Of course, Bert.
Speaker 5:Tibio?
Speaker 2:Wait.
Tara / Journey:He, Tibeo takes a sniff at his armpit and goes, Ugh.
Tim / GM:And he's got a hair there now.
Hannah / Eryn:There's no more
Tara / Journey:One hair.
Tim / GM:Yeah. The Skelly Pits. Stinky bones. Yep.
Hannah / Eryn:Well, I
Speaker 2:wanted a bath. Mhmm.
Speaker 6:You can
Tara / Journey:come to the bath too.
Speaker 2:I wanna go to the bath too.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly's gonna go eat a luxury meal by herself.
Tim / GM:Okay. Aw. When you first walk into this place, the first level is primarily a restaurant. So it's this big central, like, u shaped bar, like a, like a Japanese, like, ramen shop or something.
Tara / Journey:Kinda like an Applebee's.
Tim / GM:Oh, shit. Yeah. I guess. Yeah.
Hannah / Eryn:Or like most bars.
Speaker 5:I guess.
Tim / GM:Yeah. I guess. So, yeah. It's, like, nice and, like, dimly lit. And, like, even though this isn't the luxury area, it's still quite nice and this food smells great here.
Tim / GM:But there is this elegant door, decorated with all of these, like, leaf motifs and spirals and stuff. You are sure without a doubt that that is the luxury door for the luxury meal.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly is gonna kinda walk up to the bartender and just be like, hey, is is Dolly around?
Tim / GM:The bartender is a probably the chubbiest elf you've ever seen.
Speaker 2:And
Tim / GM:he says, if you're looking for Dolly, you just need to, ring the bell.
Hannah / Eryn:Oh, where's the bell?
Tim / GM:He points to this, like, pristine silver, like, hit it on the top to ring it kinda thing.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly hits it.
Tim / GM:Ding. You ring it and then look around excitedly, and Dolly is, like, right behind you as you
Hannah / Eryn:know. Hi. I was wondering if I could use my token for the luxe meal, and I wanted to see if you'd like to join me because all my friends went to go take a bath.
Tim / GM:He looks at the, bartender guy and then back at you and he says, I can't tell you how long it's been since anyone's invited me to anything.
Hannah / Eryn:Aw. Well, that's really sad.
Tim / GM:I will take you up on your offer.
Hannah / Eryn:Fantastic. Are you free now?
Tim / GM:He, lifts up an elbow to, like, take your arm.
Hannah / Eryn:Aw. Aliyah puts her arm in, and she nods at him to lead the way.
Tim / GM:He, walks you up to the the luxury door, where there is an attendant with a fine black bowl cut that looks up at you. There, it's like a young boy wearing, like, a very loose robe, and, he just, like, holds his hand out for your token.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly gives him the wood.
Tim / GM:He takes it and then he, like, snaps it in half. Ah. Yep. So that's cool. He, leads you in through the door, and, there's a a shift in a lot of things, in humidity, in temperature, in even the smell of the air is different in here.
Tim / GM:Your ears pop a little bit when you walk into this room. There is a long, long table, like, 25 feet long, with a, like, a stone hearth fire burning at the very end of the table. All of the walls here have these huge tall wooden arches, and it's all made out of, like, bent woodwork. Very handcrafted. Very elven looking.
Hannah / Eryn:Wow. It's gorgeous in here.
Tim / GM:We try. What's it gonna be for you? What's your diet like?
Hannah / Eryn:Oh, I mean, I eat eat pretty much anything. I love brunch.
Tim / GM:He kinda raises an eyebrow and says, breakfast for dinner?
Hannah / Eryn:Well, maybe something different this time, actually. I've had a lot of brunch.
Tim / GM:Well, most of what we've got to offer here is, fresh caught from the Feywild. He yeah. I'm gonna say he gets out a bunch of food and and just starts bringing out, like, plate after plate from this other room, of things that you're not really familiar with, but are all incredibly appetizing. Almost everything is either rolled up in a large leaf, or is, like, served on a leaf, and a lot of it is vegetables. There are some, like, fish options, like little sushi roll kind of things.
Hannah / Eryn:Is it just me and him in here?
Tim / GM:It is for the time being. Yeah. As far as, like, concrete benefits go here, you get inspiration. So you get to use that to, like, roll at a later time.
Tara / Journey:Cool.
Tim / GM:And you get, you get, like, I guess, like a shield of 20 HP. So that will just stay on you until somebody wears it off.
Hannah / Eryn:Cool. Until like someone hits me.
Speaker 2:Yep. Okay. So plus hero's feaster?
Tim / GM:Yeah. Pretty much. Yeah.
Speaker 2:It's not hot cocoa this time.
Hannah / Eryn:This is really lovely. I haven't had dinner like this in a long time. And Holly just smiles, like, sweetly at him but not in, like, an overly flirty way. Just, like, very grateful.
Tim / GM:Yeah. He's resting his chin on his, kind of arched hands. He says, so what brings you to our neck of the woods?
Hannah / Eryn:Oh, well, there was this flock of crows. Is it a flock? No. That sounds wrong.
Tim / GM:A murder. And his eyes get huge.
Hannah / Eryn:Yikes. Yeah. There were some crows that kinda spoke to us and told us to come here. I feel like you're from area, so maybe you it doesn't seem so strange to you. But at first, we thought they were trying to, like, spy on us, so we killed one of them.
Hannah / Eryn:Anyway, long story short, had to make a couple pit stops along the way, but, I'm traveling with my friend Tibio. He's from here.
Tim / GM:Well, if your goal was in the Fern Glade, I have to warn you. It's a dangerous place right now.
Hannah / Eryn:Why do you say that?
Tim / GM:Things are things are different. Things are difficult in the forest right now. The trees don't seem to greet you as warmly as before, if that makes any sense to someone like you.
Hannah / Eryn:I can't say that I've ever been greeted by a tree, but, I mean, I like trees. I'd love to be greeted by a tree.
Tim / GM:He says, well, don't anticipate it.
Hannah / Eryn:Well, that's disappointing. Is it dangerous to even venture in there? Like, are we going to
Tim / GM:That's why we're so popular right now, actually. That's my guess. We've got a lot of guests because we've got a lot of people waiting to go into the Fernglade, and they can't. There's been a lot of, a lot of undead. It's been a problem.
Tim / GM:Let's cut back to, the rest of y'all. The remaining 4 of you have just stepped into the restaurant area on the first level of this place, with your tokens in hand. And I think you were destined for the bath area. Yes?
Speaker 5:Correct.
Tim / GM:Okay. You might have, heard the clue earlier that the baths are on the second floor. You, make your way up and see that there are several luxury doors here. 3, in fact.
Speaker 5:Are they marked in any specific way?
Tim / GM:There is a black bowl cut attendant at each of them, and they're just staring at you.
Speaker 5:Hello, my good men. We're here to spend our token on the baths.
Tim / GM:The first one says, if you seek a luxury bath, it is through this door. And the second one pipes up immediately and says, if you seek luxury lodgings, they're through this door. And the third one pipes up and says, if what you truly seek is magic items, it's through this door.
Speaker 5:Is this one of those things where one of you is lying, and the other is telling the truth?
Speaker 2:I really want a bath, but I also want magic items.
Speaker 6:You can buy another token.
Speaker 2:Do we have enough gold?
Speaker 5:Oh, where are the non token baths located? In case I wanna scope those out.
Tim / GM:They all make a stink face and point down the hall. They're
Hannah / Eryn:like, oh,
Tara / Journey:they're not It's just a bucket. Yeah.
Hannah / Eryn:With a mop in it. So
Speaker 2:I still want magic items.
Tim / GM:Okay.
Speaker 2:Then I will take a bath.
Tim / GM:Okay. All of you? Yes. Okay. The attendant takes each of your the the attendant takes each of your tokens and snaps them in half as you hand them to him and, invites you into the baths.
Tim / GM:And this is a luxurious bath.
Tara / Journey:Before we go in, I as we're walking in, I lean into the attendant and I say,
Speaker 6:is there any way that I could keep one of the tokens as a souvenir? It could be a broken one. I was just wondering as a memory of coming here.
Tim / GM:He, leans in in a very private, like, kinda like on the down low sort of way, and he says, tokens are available for sale on the 1st floor by hitting the bell.
Tara / Journey:I was very interested when you started talking, and then I kind of fade a little bit.
Tim / GM:Just walk into
Speaker 2:the bathroom. See.
Tim / GM:So, this, bath house area is actually across a small second story bridge, that you have to cross over. When you open the door into this area, it's, it smells of lavender and and oils. And, there's one large square communal bath in the center, and you can see these walls that partition to, gendered baths on either side. In the central bath, however, is a very narrow man, with long dark hair. Gaspard is, taking a load off and, getting clean in the central bath here.
Tara / Journey:I I'm very excited to see him, so I shout into what I assume is a very large echoey room.
Speaker 7:Yeah.
Speaker 6:Oh, Gaspar.
Tim / GM:Yeah. It's got that, like like, pool, like, aesthetic where where, yeah, the the noise just comes right back at you and, like, Gaspard kind of splashes a little bit as he, like, turns to look at you.
Hannah / Eryn:No sound absorption whatsoever.
Tim / GM:It looks like he was, like, really, like, relaxing too, and then he's just, like, very startled upon seeing you. One of the attendants even kinda, like, looks up at you, like, startled and, like, continues folding towels
Speaker 2:and he's back down.
Tara / Journey:I wave excitedly at Gaspard, and then I point to my friends. And I turn to them and I say,
Speaker 6:this is, Gaspar. He, he gave me my loot.
Speaker 5:Oh, I wonder where that came from.
Speaker 6:Yes. I don't think I ever explained. But this is Gaspar. Peralt. I met him in Oakwild, and he gave me my loot.
Tim / GM:He looks up and says, please, all of you, get undressed and join me.
Speaker 2:Don't mind if I do. I strip immediately. Okay.
Tara / Journey:Oh, he's got one string that she pulls in.
Tim / GM:Yeah. The rip Tear away pants. Yeah. Tear away overalls.
Speaker 2:Put it into the overall. Yeah.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Your overalls are canon canonically tear away. Oh, no. There's just upholstery in there.
Tara / Journey:I love it.
Speaker 5:Bert, she especially undresses and enters the bath.
Tim / GM:Okay. Bert, do you do that thing where you, like, undress under a towel, and then you kind of, like, slip your body, like, under the towel
Speaker 5:in the bath? Like scuttling over to the bathroom.
Speaker 2:Yes. Good.
Speaker 5:Great radio.
Speaker 2:I don't I wanna just get in the same tub.
Speaker 7:Yeah. Mhmm. It's it's, yeah.
Tara / Journey:It's in the middle. Mhmm.
Hannah / Eryn:Okay.
Speaker 7:Snack takes off all of his clothes, but he, takes them with him into the bath before they are dirty.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Alright. So, yeah, snack, like, gets to work while the rest of you, like, settle in here.
Tim / GM:An attendant comes by and pours some, water on these steaming rocks, and it billows out a bunch of steam and, just kind of, is on his way and then sort of departs the area so that you're truly private, the 5 of you.
Tara / Journey:I take off all my clothes, and I have no problem walking around naked. But I'm also carrying all of my bones really carefully in the mesh bag that I keep on my person. And, I bring them to an attendant and I ask if they can, ex
Speaker 6:excuse me. Are you able to, it's not it's not a big deal if you cannot, but could you, steam these?
Tim / GM:A bone steaming? Of course.
Speaker 6:Oh, messy, messy.
Speaker 5:They might be able to do that for your clothes as well, mister Snake.
Tim / GM:Is this true? The attendant nods and, like, holds out a a hand with 2 fingers to kind of, like, pluck them out of
Tara / Journey:the water.
Speaker 7:Many thanks.
Tim / GM:Yeah. They take your clothes and your bones and put them in a little, like, wooden cage and then set them over the rocks to be steam cleaned.
Tara / Journey:Cool.
Speaker 2:Yeah. That's so nice. I love that you have a delicates bag
Hannah / Eryn:for your bones. Gotta.
Speaker 2:I sink in and just let out all the air from my lungs. I close my eyes. Fully floats. Yeah. This is great.
Speaker 7:Is this hot enough for everyone? I think it could be a little warmer.
Speaker 5:I I know where you're going with a snack, and I'm good.
Speaker 6:What are we talking about? Tibio has dunked his
Tara / Journey:head underwater and is making his hair stick straight up in there.
Speaker 7:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is born, in this area as well?
Tim / GM:You have not, like, explored the entire area.
Speaker 7:Okay. Okay. Got it.
Tim / GM:He's not in the central bath. It's a very quiet bathhouse. You realize Gaspar is not exactly a talker and seems very comfortable with 4 strangers. And he's just, like, sitting there and, like, occasionally kind of, like, playing with the water. Like, you see him, like, flapping his hands underwater to make the surface of the water distort a little bit, and does that, like, backwards hair thing where you, like, smooth it out.
Hannah / Eryn:Mhmm.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Oh,
Speaker 7:Gaspard, was it?
Speaker 5:So you were in Hogwild around the same time as us. Is that right?
Tim / GM:That's where I met, Master Tibio.
Speaker 6:Oh, Caspar Caspar. I forgot to tell you. Uli's father, he plays many instrument, and, he showed me how to play,
Tara / Journey:this and this and this, and Tibio is making, like, chord hands formations. Mhmm.
Tim / GM:That's some impressive progress. I'm glad you're sticking with it.
Speaker 5:That's right. We have you to thank for Tibio's lute that he was playing all the way here.
Speaker 2:It's a treat.
Tim / GM:Yeah. He just says, yes.
Tara / Journey:Tibio is smiling and he's not catching the sarcasm.
Speaker 7:Tibio, did you tell Gasparin?
Speaker 6:Did I tell him what?
Speaker 7:About the, and I make with a, minor illusion, I make a crow fly through the room and then disappear quickly.
Speaker 6:Oh, well, Gaspar knows who I am.
Speaker 7:And everything else? The reason we are here?
Tim / GM:I suspected who he might be, and I think now it's confirmed. You're you're heading into the Fernglade, aren't you?
Speaker 6:Yes. I'm supposed to see my family and check-in.
Tim / GM:He, stands up and he says, I I have to insist that you don't. I implore you not to enter the fern glade.
Speaker 6:But it is my home. My family isn't inside.
Tim / GM:Something is wrong in there, Master Tibio.
Speaker 6:Something is wrong?
Tim / GM:The dead are not at rest. I I can scarcely enter. I thought it would be over by now. It's why I fled the Fernglaid in the first place.
Speaker 6:You fled? Then it is even more important that I go. My family is in danger.
Speaker 2:And where you go, we go.
Tara / Journey:Tibia starts to, like, get out of the bath and is, like, towing off a little bit like, well, shit. I gotta go now.
Tim / GM:Tibia, were your parents Talos and Maxilla?
Speaker 6:Yes. But do you know their names?
Tim / GM:They are celebrated figures in my circle. I fear they have abandoned their post. The deal they had is something is wrong. Tibia, and I can't solve it.
Speaker 6:There must be a way to
Tim / GM:fix it. This has been
Speaker 6:my family's responsibility for generations.
Tim / GM:I think I understand. Let's let's enjoy our bath and and then we should talk.
Tara / Journey:Okay. Tito starts to sit down slowly in the bath again. He's looking very concerned.
Tim / GM:Does the
Speaker 2:bath do anything for us?
Tim / GM:You do get inspiration, information, and relaxation. Dolly, is splitting with you a, 3 tiered pistachio ice cream delight.
Hannah / Eryn:Hell, yeah. That sounds tasty.
Tara / Journey:Pistachio ice cream's the first kind. Spamoni.
Tim / GM:He says, don't make yourself sick. Eat as little as you like or as much.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly has 2 cheeks full of ice cream, and she's like, this is so good. Oh, brain freeze.
Tim / GM:You know, it's not leans in real close and says, we're in the Feywild right now. That's why it's so different here.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly gulps down her ice cream. Yeah.
Tim / GM:It makes it much easier to import exotic things like this.
Hannah / Eryn:It's a wonderful place. I'm loving it so far.
Tim / GM:Wow. He, leans back in his chair and says, we've gotten a bad rep, us fae. We're not trusted.
Hannah / Eryn:Wait. You're
Speaker 6:Faye?
Tim / GM:He, like, twinkles his eyes a little bit and he says, in the flesh.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly's just, like, mouth is open and she's just smiling, and, like, we can see all her teeth. She also looks now like she wants to eat them up.
Tim / GM:It's true. We, Fae, get to, alter our appearance a little bit. So I've done a little bit of designer work with the way you see me, and my name is not Dolly at all, of course. I have a fae name. But I can't tell you that or you'd be able to tell me what to do.
Hannah / Eryn:Oh, that's okay. I mean, Dolly is an awesome name.
Tim / GM:I think so. And he gives a self satisfied smirk. You 2 were kind of, finishing up your dessert here and he says, is there anything I can do to make your stay more amenable? I quite like you, Holly.
Hannah / Eryn:What the fuck?
Speaker 2:Hannah cannot handle it. You did this to yourself.
Hannah / Eryn:No. It's okay. Holly, as she's eating, the last bites of ice cream, every bite she gets a little bit closer, like, to Dolly.
Speaker 2:Wow. This was
Hannah / Eryn:amazing. Maybe a nightcap?
Speaker 2:Every man. You've come across Yeah.
Tim / GM:Give me, It's
Hannah / Eryn:not every man.
Tara / Journey:Holly's on spring break.
Tim / GM:She is she's on a she's on a kick. That's for sure. But, give me, persuasion with advantage. I think you've done a lot to grease the wheels now.
Tara / Journey:Where's seduction on this sheet?
Tim / GM:No kidding.
Hannah / Eryn:I rolled it at
Tara / Journey:20. For fuck's sake. Ashley, though.
Speaker 2:Oh my god.
Speaker 5:For fuck's sake. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Can she roll another one to see if she
Hannah / Eryn:No. I oh. It's a crit
Speaker 5:it's like Critical fuck.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I
Tim / GM:don't I don't wanna go into the implications of what that would mean.
Speaker 6:A deer
Hannah / Eryn:racer's not the ghost. Fuck.
Tara / Journey:She's a clinical hit.
Speaker 5:It's pretty good.
Tim / GM:Pretty good.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah, baby. Now we're playing D and D.
Speaker 5:Okay.
Tim / GM:He yeah. He just gives you one huge smirk, and you can see his eyes flash a bit of violet. And he says, say no more. And he, leans in close about 90% and stops right in front of your face.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. Holly eagerly leans in and kisses him, open mouth.
Speaker 2:Fade the bug.
Tim / GM:He, like, he, like, kind of, like, pushes your shoulder a little bit, and you feel yourself losing your balance backward. And, you hear, like, a snapping of wood, and all of a sudden, you just fall onto this curtained bed.
Speaker 2:I'm so glad he took
Tara / Journey:Yeah. Yeah.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Right.
Speaker 5:Roll initiative.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. Alright.
Speaker 2:Does she regain her spell slips?
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. What's my buff for having sex
Tim / GM:with a fake picture? Man. God. So the 4 of you, have, are finishing up your bath. You're not quite done yet.
Tim / GM:Is there anything else you wanted to get accomplished in the bath?
Speaker 2:Snack. Let's have a holding your breath contest. And then I go underwater. This is
Tim / GM:where Uli kills snack.
Speaker 7:Snack dives in immediately as well. Mhmm. And, splays out, belly facing down, just staring at Uli intently as he holds his breath.
Speaker 2:I'm just like a boulder at the bottom of the pool.
Tim / GM:Okay. Great.
Speaker 2:And then staring back.
Tim / GM:Oh, man. This is tough. I mean, Snag is a lizard. Let's have you both make a constitution check with advantage.
Speaker 5:Snack, you still have guidance.
Speaker 7:That's true. I won't I won't use guidance if I don't have to.
Tara / Journey:You don't
Tim / GM:have to. Okay. You
Speaker 5:don't have to.
Speaker 7:Cool.
Speaker 2:No. Hey.
Speaker 5:Natural I'm
Speaker 7:kidding. 20.
Hannah / Eryn:I rolled a 19.
Tim / GM:Oh, man. Woah.
Speaker 2:Damn it.
Speaker 7:You're you're
Tim / GM:both face down on the water or, like, in the water for, like, 4 and a half minutes. And, like, everybody else is, like, toweled off and, like, staring at you guys.
Speaker 2:Been down there
Tim / GM:a long time. And then oh, yeah.
Tara / Journey:Tibio didn't understand the competition, so he's clapping for Uli as she comes out of the water.
Hannah / Eryn:He's still
Speaker 2:down there. Heck.
Tim / GM:You see, you you all hear this, like, like, patting of wet footprints as the attendant is, like, sprinting across the room, and he grabs this, like, lifesaver, and he, like, throws it into the pool, and he says, grab on. Grab on.
Speaker 7:Snack is startled by this and, like, pushes, with his tail against the the wall to, like, move out of the way of the object as it's thrown. And then I, scamper out of the pool.
Tara / Journey:Okay. Tibia claps again.
Speaker 2:Congratulations. I almost beat Hugh.
Tim / GM:Gaspar starts clapping Just
Speaker 7:That was quite admirable, Uli. I don't think I've ever met someone to hold their breath so long. Yeah. Except for me, of course.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Best 2 out of 3?
Speaker 7:Of course.
Speaker 2:And then I cast aquatic adaptation. Okay. And we can just cut from there.
Hannah / Eryn:Snack, drowns, and dies.
Tim / GM:So yeah. Would anybody like to purchase additional tokens?
Tara / Journey:Yeah. Oui. K.
Speaker 5:Oh, we're getting some magic items.
Tim / GM:Alright.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. I wanna go to the magic shop too after
Speaker 5:You are
Hannah / Eryn:after I'm done. Boinking. Yeah. I mean, it's like, you know, a couple hours.
Tara / Journey:We have to wait until Holly's done.
Speaker 7:Done with the candy shop.
Speaker 5:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Yeah. She's been eating dinner for a while.
Tim / GM:Holly, you all saw her walk into the restaurant, the luxurious restaurant wing, and then you also her walk out of the luxurious bed area with Dolly.
Speaker 2:Taking a tour,
Hannah / Eryn:Hi. Oh, no. We just had sex.
Tara / Journey:Tibial blushes.
Speaker 2:Holy blushes, I think.
Hannah / Eryn:I'm really beat. And that bath sounds nice, but I'm really interested in the shop. How about you guys?
Speaker 6:Yeah. Yes. It's actually wonderful timing. Mister Dolly?
Tim / GM:Dolly, like, comes out of the same door and closes it behind him, and he says that was hello. Hello. Hello.
Speaker 6:We would like to purchase additional tokens to see the magic items.
Tim / GM:Love to hear it. The going price is 50 gold pieces for a token.
Speaker 6:Okay.
Speaker 5:Is there any sort of group discount?
Tim / GM:Afraid not. I mean, he holds out 1 in front of you.
Speaker 5:Fair enough.
Speaker 6:Do we each want 1?
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. Yes, please.
Tara / Journey:So that's 50 times 5 is 250.
Tim / GM:Cha ching. So he, opens the door himself, to the the third floor. The attendant takes each of your tokens and snaps them immediately. It does seem wasteful But each of you take the stairs and walk into this room, that is not unlike a museum, the way they've set up everything with these very dramatic, like, overhead lights shining down on specific objects around the room. I'll just rattle them off quickly what you see here.
Tim / GM:You see a floating ring, a floating set of keys, a rod with an iron gauntlet at the end, a stack of wooden tokens, a spinning ring, a lumpy bag, a layered robe, a black ring, a cooking pot, a stick of chalk, a black shroud, a wooden mask, a glowing short sword, a small wooden whistle, and a small colorful pouch.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly is very interested in the black shroud that she sees. She, makes a beeline right for, that display. Is it, like, on a mannequin head, but it's, like, very dramatically lit? Yep. I'm just like, yeah.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly is very much attracted to that and wants to check it out.
Tim / GM:The, the curator, steps out from behind a curtain. They were just like they were hiding behind a curtain, like, in the side of the room in order to be mysterious. And they just, like, step out and, approach you, Holly, softly from behind. And they say, have you found something you like?
Hannah / Eryn:Oh my gosh. You
Tara / Journey:Alan Rickman. Alan.
Speaker 2:Alright. A stick of chalk.
Speaker 7:Perhaps a small wooden whistle.
Hannah / Eryn:Oh my god. Alright.
Tim / GM:I see you've taken an interest to the funeral shroud.
Hannah / Eryn:Oh, a funeral shroud? Oh, I mean, I thought it was just a glam goth moment, but,
Tim / GM:No. It it shrouds you from death.
Hannah / Eryn:Oh, that might be helpful, considering where we're going.
Tim / GM:He, lifts it from the mannequin and, puts it on, over your head, and he says, yes. Yes. It suits you perfectly.
Hannah / Eryn:I'll take it.
Tim / GM:I haven't even told you what it does.
Hannah / Eryn:What does it do?
Tim / GM:Necrotic damage. You have resistance to it. Disease. You're immune to it. You age half as fast, and your life force can't be taken from you.
Hannah / Eryn:That, seems like it would be really useful
Tim / GM:for to purchase this item.
Hannah / Eryn:Me. How much?
Tim / GM:Prices here are negotiable. For you, I would charge 400 gold pieces.
Hannah / Eryn:Now, you know, I have had, some things that I like to refer to as sponsorships in the past. I'm Holly Hyacinth, by the way, famed fashion designer of Tildrey. And when I wear something, people notice, And everyone will wanna know where I got this gorgeous shroud.
Tim / GM:I believe we run-in different circles. I'm not sure that many of my prospective clients would ever lay eyes upon you. I could be mistaken. Exposure is not a bad thing. 350 gold pieces.
Hannah / Eryn:How about we make a deal? You give it to me for a 100 gold pieces, and then I will refer everyone to your shop. But if you haven't had maybe, say, 10 sales due to me in the next 6 months, I can come back and pay you the rest.
Tim / GM:I will accept this deal with adjustments to the terms. A 100 gold? Fine. However, if you do not send 10 paying customers in our direction, you will pay 500 gold pieces. How are these terms?
Hannah / Eryn:Sure. Sounds good. Holly's very confident she can convince people to come shop at their store.
Tim / GM:He reaches out to shake your hand.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly shakes it.
Tim / GM:Holly and everyone else in this room, sees a little bit of magic taking place right there. Those of you who are privy to, well, I guess it's really just Holly knows that the Fae are involved with this place, obviously. But, yeah, Holly, you've just entered a, a Fae bargain. Excellent.
Speaker 2:Oh, those are fine.
Tara / Journey:Those are good at cross scary. Top of your character
Speaker 2:sheet to do this. No.
Tim / GM:I remember.
Speaker 5:Here's a question. Will we meet 10 NPCs?
Hannah / Eryn:Okay. Holly, pays for the shroud and then turns around and huddles everyone together and says, everyone, come here. Come here. Come here. Huddle it.
Speaker 5:What's happening? Who's going on?
Hannah / Eryn:Holly's wearing the shroud now, and she says Cool
Speaker 5:shroud, Holly.
Hannah / Eryn:Thank you.
Tim / GM:Did you
Speaker 2:get it?
Hannah / Eryn:Listen. I just bought this shroud at this shop, and now I need you all to say Holly Hyacinth referred you.
Speaker 7:Holly Hyacinth referred you.
Hannah / Eryn:No. Referred you snack. When you buy something, you must say, this is very important or it'll cost us
Speaker 2:for Start
Speaker 7:over it, Holly. I'm getting confused.
Hannah / Eryn:Snack? Repeat after me. Holly Hyacinth.
Speaker 7:No. Yes. Holly Hyacinth.
Hannah / Eryn:Sent me.
Speaker 7:Sent me.
Hannah / Eryn:And I want to buy shit.
Speaker 7:And I want to buy shit.
Hannah / Eryn:Perfect. Everyone understand?
Speaker 7:Yep. Mostly.
Hannah / Eryn:Alright. Great. Thank you, friends. And then Holly walks around with her arms spread out, just like being glamorous with the shroud on and, like, kind of walking around the shop and looking in mirrors at herself.
Speaker 7:And Snack eats some of this chalk that is on display.
Speaker 2:Snack, you didn't buy that.
Speaker 7:Well, I'm trying to doubt Oli first.
Tim / GM:The, the curator approaches you, like, very quickly, and he, like, swats your nose. And, like, you're a 7 foot tall, like, draconoid now. And he says, no, naughty.
Speaker 7:Do you know who I am?
Tim / GM:He looks you up and down, and he kinda, like, sets the chalk back into the middle of the pillow, and he says, I do not.
Speaker 7:Holly Hyacinth sent me. I am here to buy shit.
Tim / GM:You see his eyes flick for just a second back at Holly, and he says, wise woman. Is it this talk you're interested in?
Speaker 7:Did it taste good or no? No. I think not this was not a wonderful thing.
Tim / GM:For the better. And he dusts a little bit of like straight chalk.
Speaker 7:Well, what does it do?
Tim / GM:Are you any good at drawing?
Speaker 7:I literally have never tried since being born.
Tim / GM:Well, he holds the chalk in his hand and says, this is known as architect's chalk. In a built space, you could draw a door, a wall, a hole. It'll be made real.
Speaker 7:How much for this chalk?
Tim / GM:200 gold pieces.
Speaker 7:I look around nervously.
Speaker 5:I think everybody's probably engrossed in their own magical items.
Speaker 7:I will buy this. Yes.
Tim / GM:I'll have you know before you make the purchase. This uses up quite quickly. I imagine you'll get 3 shapes of it before it's consumed.
Speaker 7:I do want this chalk, shopkeeper.
Tim / GM:Very well. The house commands 200 gold pieces for the chalk.
Speaker 7:Snack believes the house is outrageous, and Snack will offer you 5 gold.
Tim / GM:5 gold. Yes. The house counters with 195.
Speaker 7:Snack stands, up straight and, glowers upon him. 175. I will accept nothing short of a 100 and, he looks around nervously. 75 gold pieces.
Tim / GM:He, like, looks at the rest of the people in the room as, like, did anyone else hear this? And then he looks back at you and says, we accept.
Speaker 7:And they, jump into the lamp and pull out the coins.
Tim / GM:He's waiting for you when you come back out and just hands it to you.
Speaker 2:Does Genie help you count them?
Speaker 7:He's He's
Tim / GM:got them ready for you when you want. And, who would be next? We prefer that no one gets seconds before everyone's had a chance.
Speaker 2:What are these, the wooden tokens for the what?
Speaker 6:Yes?
Hannah / Eryn:Holly, like, looks at Uli?
Speaker 2:Yeah. I was going to. Don't forget. I was told by a passerby named Holly Hyacinth
Tim / GM:Mhmm.
Speaker 2:That I should buy things here.
Tim / GM:Very good.
Speaker 2:So what are these? Are these for the rest of the the shop?
Tim / GM:No. No. These wooden tokens are quite different. Popular among agricultural types, these, summon a storm, though the severity varies.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Tim / GM:You may get cloud cover or sprinkling. You might also cause a flood. Use them with caution.
Speaker 2:How much?
Tim / GM:The house asks 50 gold pieces per token.
Speaker 2:Just a second. Hey, Tibio. Use I need a 150 gold.
Tara / Journey:Okay. And, Tibio shovels out a 150 gold. Awesome. Thanks.
Speaker 2:Yes. I would like to purchase these, please, per Holly Hysen's request.
Tim / GM:Yes. Per her request. He takes your gold and then he, puts the tokens into a little linen bag and ties them up for you.
Speaker 2:Thank you. Pleasure doing business with you. And I bow very awkwardly. Holly winks at Uli.
Tim / GM:Any other discerning buyers among you?
Speaker 7:Why
Speaker 5:yes. I was looking at this crystal ball over here. My friend, Holly Hyacinth, told me to pick up some reagents on her behalf.
Tim / GM:Did she? I hope for Harley Hyacinth's sake that you'd been given a good amount of money.
Speaker 5:I know how expensive these can get. I see it's a little dusty here on the shelf. Seems like it hasn't moved in quite a while.
Tim / GM:He, uses a cloth to pick it up and holds it against the light delicately and he says, this one has been with us for some time.
Speaker 5:Well, how much you going for?
Tim / GM:He, like, buffs one little scratch out of it and he says, for such an old chap, 950 gold pieces. Fuck.
Speaker 5:950. It's a little high. Tell you what, rather than haggling price, any chance you could throw in a stick of incense or 2?
Tim / GM:He says, we've seen some of your types coming through. Let's call us an even one thousand, and we'll have you well suited. Incense, crystal ball, every accoutrement you're going to need. And I'm gonna say that this will stand in for further, reagent resources that you're gonna need. He's gonna give you, like, a reagent pack.
Speaker 5:Great.
Tim / GM:Okay. I say anything that come that costs under a 1000 gold, you're just clear for now. Do we have a deal?
Speaker 5:Well, I know how hard it can be to find these things, so
Tim / GM:I think you got yourself a deal, pal. Brilliant. That's a lot of money.
Tara / Journey:So you come over and ask for a 1,000 gold and 2 goes, like, okay, a 1,000?
Speaker 5:Remember I it's for spying on Joe. It could give us the upper hand.
Speaker 6:Okay. I guess when we get to my homeland, I could ask my grandma for some money.
Speaker 5:Maybe we'll find a big cave full of money.
Speaker 2:Would you be willing to buy things from us?
Tim / GM:We are interested in acquiring new, valuables.
Speaker 2:Do they have to be magical?
Tim / GM:Not Worth a 1,000, you say?
Speaker 2:Yes.
Tim / GM:Might I appraise it myself?
Speaker 2:Yes. But I have it on good authority that it is worth that much.
Speaker 5:The price tag is still on
Hannah / Eryn:it. Yes.
Tim / GM:You pull the emerald out of your fucking pocket.
Speaker 2:It's still warm.
Tim / GM:Yeah. He takes your warm emerald and, like,
Hannah / Eryn:some lint off of it.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Like, there's a piece of dirty rice attached to it or something. Yeah. He, brings it under a light and inspects it, and he says, indeed, it found you a little specimen. But to be of any use to the house, we would need to purchase it at 850.
Speaker 2:An emerald of this quality and size, I think you are underselling. Or I'm underselling. How does that work? Money.
Tim / GM:Well, we need to be able to turn a profit on this item.
Speaker 2:Right. But that's quite a profit.
Tim / GM:I'm not confident we could resell this for 1200. I think we'd resell it for 1,000. And at 850, that's not much of a profit for us to take on such a risk.
Speaker 2:For 850?
Tim / GM:It seems fair to me.
Speaker 2:875.
Tara / Journey:And you could keep the rice.
Speaker 2:And you can keep
Tim / GM:He says, fine, but this does not count as a sale for miss Holly Hyacinth.
Speaker 2:Of course not.
Tim / GM:Deal.
Speaker 2:I've been holding on to that since lamplight? Young
Tim / GM:sir, I believe you have dibs.
Speaker 6:Yes. I was sent by to purchase something from the shop. Holly smiles.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly nods in the corner.
Tim / GM:He, holds up just a hand with 4 fingers on it, kind of idly towards you, Holly.
Hannah / Eryn:I got my tally written down.
Tim / GM:And he says, and what has piqued your interest?
Speaker 6:I I do not know. There are many interesting magical items certainly, but none that I have found necessarily extremely interesting. What does this whistle do?
Tim / GM:This is something gifted to the house itself. A gift from the Fae.
Speaker 6:Oh, wow.
Tim / GM:This whistle causes woodland creatures to, eagerly obey your commands.
Speaker 6:How long does it last?
Tim / GM:As long as it takes to complete the task. Should you come on them to distract another, they'd be out of the scene in a matter of minutes. If you ask one of them to guide you to water, for instance, that might take an entire day.
Speaker 6:They could not be made to harm themselves, could they?
Tim / GM:I should hope not. It's really for those seeking help when they're in the forests.
Speaker 6:I see.
Tim / GM:I don't believe they'd harm themselves for your sake.
Speaker 6:And how much are you asking for this whistle?
Tim / GM:It's been a difficult one to sell. I would try to part for it for a 150 gold pieces.
Tara / Journey:I would take it for 100 gold. And Tibio, like, tilts his head and looks at you kinda weird.
Speaker 2:How far are you tilting it? Awkwardly.
Tim / GM:This is gonna seem weird that I'm just doing it just now, but, give me a, I'm gonna say persuasion. Is it it's not called diplomacy in this, is it?
Speaker 7:No. No.
Tim / GM:Persuasion. Yeah. Persuasion, I think.
Tara / Journey:Persasion?
Tim / GM:Tan. Mhmm. He says, let's make it a 125.
Speaker 6:Okay. But you must, give me a bag to hold it in.
Tim / GM:Yeah. He, he grabs you a, I'll say it's it's like a silken bag, but an actually, like, nice piece of kit that he grabs from behind the counter.
Speaker 7:Alright. Mister
Tim / GM:House. He he looks at you with his face that's like, I guess.
Speaker 7:Holly Hyacinth has sent me here to buy goods.
Tim / GM:He he's, like, kinda staring at the floor. He's, like, bewildered, like, what do I do?
Speaker 2:You can say 10 sales.
Tara / Journey:Dormammu would cut the bargain. Yeah.
Tim / GM:How can I help you?
Speaker 7:I am interested in this ring, but it is covered in dust.
Tim / GM:Covered in dust, you say? And he, like, takes a close look and says, I don't think so.
Speaker 7:Well, I I saw it with my keen eyes.
Tim / GM:The ring is 300 gold pieces. What does it do? Well, have you ever wanted to jump as tall as this building? Yes. It will do just that for you.
Speaker 7:Well, again, your prices, mister House, make me angry.
Tim / GM:It's not lupus.
Speaker 7:I prefer 20 gold for this ring. And I'll take this dusty, dirty, nasty ring, and I'll take it off your hands.
Tim / GM:Are you quite certain I should not be speaking with one of your friends?
Speaker 7:I I look around,
Tim / GM:who's Holly's probably, like, the least interested in other items at this point.
Hannah / Eryn:I'm interested in something else.
Tim / GM:Are you? Okay.
Speaker 7:Okay. Okay. Holly's occupied, Bert.
Speaker 5:Bert's walking into the ring section.
Speaker 7:Okay.
Hannah / Eryn:That's where Holly is. Holly shoves him out of the way.
Speaker 7:That's where
Hannah / Eryn:we are.
Speaker 2:Nothing. There are 3 rings.
Tim / GM:What ring are you 2 looking at?
Hannah / Eryn:Black ring.
Tim / GM:Black ring. Oh, yeah. Okay. So Holly's been, like, waiting her turn to talk about the black ring, and Bert walks up and is like, oh, what is this?
Speaker 5:Oh, this ring works nice.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly's like, is
Speaker 2:it in my cart? No. She, like, shoved
Tim / GM:him out
Hannah / Eryn:of the way.
Speaker 7:Yes. Actually, Tibio.
Speaker 6:Yes.
Speaker 7:Tibio, come, please.
Speaker 6:How how can I help?
Speaker 7:Well, I need your assistance. Mister House is being a dick, and he has stated prices that are unfair to me.
Tim / GM:When you said that, mister House actually starts cracking up a little bit, and he says
Speaker 7:a 150 gold pieces. Tibia, does that seem fair for this ring?
Speaker 6:What does it do?
Speaker 7:I can jump as big as this building.
Speaker 6:I think that that is fair.
Speaker 7:Wonderful. Tibio, I need 150 gold pieces.
Speaker 6:What happened to your money?
Speaker 7:Oh, well, Tibio, you you have the party's gold. Right?
Speaker 2:You also have the party's gold.
Speaker 7:I feel like everyone's crowding me and I'm getting nervous. I'm trying to do this transaction.
Speaker 6:Snack, why do you not pay him with your own money?
Speaker 7:Well, I just since we are allies and all, then
Speaker 6:Yes. And you have half of our money.
Speaker 7:Tibial, look at me.
Speaker 2:As he's distracted with this argument, I tap on the lamp. And I go, hey, Genie. 150, please.
Tim / GM:What's that?
Speaker 2:We need some money, please.
Speaker 7:Oh, sure.
Tim / GM:And he just starts, like, sputtering gold out of the lamp. He's like, is that enough?
Speaker 6:Snack, I am looking at you. What do you do want?
Tim / GM:Snack, like like Do I notice this? 15 or 20 coins have just, like, spurted out of the lamp.
Speaker 7:Genie, this we will speak of this later. Tibeel.
Tim / GM:You hear like a gasp.
Speaker 7:Tobio, look at me. Look at how big I am
Speaker 2:now.
Speaker 6:Looking at you, I see you snuck.
Speaker 7:Yes. And look at how long my arms are, and I reach up above my head.
Speaker 6:They are very impressive. You have gone quite much
Tim / GM:Yes.
Speaker 6:Over the last week.
Speaker 7:Yes. Tibio. And I grab Tibio on the shoulders. And I must maintain enough gold so that I can lay about it.
Speaker 6:I am not made of gold, Snek.
Speaker 7:I am not asking much of you, Tibia. I'm asking for part of the party's gold. How do you think people would look upon me to see a dragon with no gold pile of which he can lay?
Speaker 6:Well, Snack, if you do not
Tim / GM:want to
Speaker 5:not a
Speaker 7:dragon at all.
Speaker 6:If you do not want to have less gold, you cannot spend your gold. It is the ruse.
Speaker 7:Fine. I grabbed the gold that's on the ground and I go into the lamp and
Tim / GM:I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. I was just I was making myself some snacks and they'd asked for gold and I just gave it to them. Snack.
Speaker 7:No. It's fine, Ginny. It is quite alright what you have done. I, was just nervous because I was negotiating prices.
Tara / Journey:With Tibeo.
Speaker 7:With with Tibeo. Yes.
Tim / GM:All is
Speaker 7:well though, Genie.
Tim / GM:Good. Good. He, he, like, conjures, like, a fake vault and, like, spins the wheels on and opens it up and just gold pours out of it.
Speaker 7:Okay. Yeah. I, hesitate for a second, but then climb out with the gold and hand it over.
Hannah / Eryn:It's nice
Speaker 2:to know I can ask Genie for gold and he'll just do it.
Tim / GM:Maybe not after
Speaker 2:that.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Ring of Jumping is yours. Wonderful. He says, I hear a good deal of intrigue from over here. And he points to, Bert and Holly.
Hannah / Eryn:Holly, is using the shroud to kinda cover the case where the ring is, like, so that Bert can't see it as good. And she, like, has her hands on it, and she's like, what does this one do? And she's referring to the black ring.
Tim / GM:Yes. The ring of revenge. Tell me, have you ever wanted to, slap the smile off someone's face when they've done you harm?
Hannah / Eryn:Have you ever worked in retail?
Tim / GM:He rolls his eyes and
Hannah / Eryn:says,
Tim / GM:tell me about it. It will protect you a bit in the first place, but should you still receive a woeful force, you can take revenge on someone by conjuring a magical hand to slap the shit out
Speaker 7:of them.
Hannah / Eryn:That sounds fun. Bert, I know you were looking at this ring as well.
Speaker 5:I had my eye on this one. You know, I've got this cool axe now. I thought I might be a little more frontline in the action.
Tim / GM:He says a 100 gold pieces.
Speaker 5:Maybe you've got something else that can offer some protection?
Tim / GM:If it's just the protection you're after, might I recommend and he gestures to a, layered robe that is laid over a, like, mannequin body. Does not only do you, gain a little bit of toughness, but you're able to use the shield spell to defend yourself from things like magic missiles or incoming arrows.
Speaker 5:Oh, I like this. Holly, what do you think? Does this robe go with my x? And he strikes a dorky pose.
Hannah / Eryn:It looks fabulous. Don't forget to say who sent you.
Tim / GM:Do we have a deal?
Speaker 5:Well, Holly over there
Tim / GM:Damn it. Sent
Speaker 5:sent me to buy this.
Tim / GM:Yes.
Speaker 5:I mean, that's not a dishonest interpretation of what just happened.
Tim / GM:I suppose not. 250 gold pieces, have we a deal?
Speaker 2:How much money do we have left?
Tim / GM:Tibia was sitting there with, like, a the, like, one handed calculator. Abacus. Yeah.
Hannah / Eryn:Just like a bunch of receipt paper.
Tim / GM:Little visor.
Tara / Journey:Glasses down to here.
Tim / GM:Yep. The green visor. He's smoking a cigarette.
Speaker 5:She's just he's just, like, shaking his head like
Tim / GM:I can't make these numbers balance.
Speaker 5:What say ye to an even 2 hundo?
Tim / GM:What say ye to 250?
Speaker 2:Isn't that the original asking price?
Speaker 5:I say ye.
Tim / GM:I've grown somewhat weary of your recommendations, Holly.
Hannah / Eryn:I mean, you've made more sales in the last 30 minutes than you would have otherwise.
Tim / GM:Is that so?
Hannah / Eryn:Yes. That is so. If I would have told these people to leave this shop, they would have because they are my friends, and I am their influencer. Ah,
Tim / GM:I see. So you're the undisputed leader of this party.
Hannah / Eryn:I didn't say that.
Speaker 7:That is outrageous.
Tim / GM:Oh, should it be you setting the, spending and bargaining?
Speaker 7:Well, yes. And I am quite slighted by my supposed ally.
Tim / GM:It seems to me that you're being told what to do and how much to pay.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. By you, House.
Tim / GM:Well, it seems by you, Holly, by your own admission, you're the one causing all of these sales, aren't you? Telling them what to do and all?
Hannah / Eryn:No. I just said to tell them. To tell you I sent them.
Tim / GM:Well, how does that sit with you, master dragon?
Speaker 7:I am quite confused. Do I need to buy more things?
Hannah / Eryn:Hello. Mister House, I sent myself here to purchase this black thing.
Speaker 2:I don't know
Tim / GM:if that counts, but I quite like you. So that is your 7th sale.
Hannah / Eryn:Thank you. 100 gold?
Tim / GM:A 100 gold unless anyone else in this room has a better offer.
Speaker 7:What does it do at 125 gold?
Tim / GM:It smites your enemies should they attack you.
Speaker 2:Hey, snack. What? Remember that conversation we had yesterday with the great big golden
Speaker 7:Yes. Mentor? Mhmm.
Speaker 2:Yes. Idris did not like that you took revenge.
Speaker 7:I don't see how that's relevant right now, Lee. We are negotiating prices.
Speaker 2:Right. I'm
Tim / GM:Yes. We're negotiating the purchase of the Ring of Revenge.
Speaker 2:Yes. The Ring of Revenge.
Speaker 7:Those words are the same thing. I forgot.
Speaker 2:They mean the same thing.
Speaker 7:Yes. Holly, how dare you buy such a ring? I forbid it. We are not the vengeful folk anymore.
Speaker 2:Holly's not trying to become a dragon.
Tim / GM:I
Speaker 7:guess you can do as you wish, Holly.
Hannah / Eryn:Alright. I'll take the ring. Here is your 100 gold. And she, like, looks over at Tibio with her hand open.
Tara / Journey:Tibio is getting a little frantic with the funds. He still, like, grabs a 100 and hands it to Holly, and then he kind of, like, hugs the bag of money to him like,
Speaker 6:are we done shopping soon?
Hannah / Eryn:Holly buys the ring of revenge.
Tim / GM:Yep. Right before he takes the money, he looks around. And says going twice. Very well.
Hannah / Eryn:Thanks, Uli.
Tim / GM:Is that quite everything? Or have we yet more interest?
Speaker 6:Oh, I hope that is everything.
Speaker 5:Look, I've spent enough money today, but I just can't go without learning about those that set of keys over there.
Tim / GM:Yes. You have been a, high roller. I suppose I could give you a bit of a deal, These keys, he, push the pushes the keys into, like, thin air and turns the key and opens it. And, you see, like, a desk, like, fold down, like a flat surface with all these extra little cubbies for, like, inks and quills and paper and all this extra, like, stationery and stuff like that. He demonstrates the same thing with this, cabinet that's got plenty of storage space.
Tim / GM:Could be like a linen closet. You know, it could be for other stuff. And then finally, a fully loaded tea and coffee bar.
Speaker 5:Bert's hands are on the side of his face, and he's, like, dancing back and forth.
Tim / GM:Tell you what. Normally, I'd ask 400 gold pieces for these.
Speaker 6:Oh, no. Oh, no.
Tim / GM:For you, who I quite like yes? A 100 gold pieces. A 100
Speaker 5:gold. Tibio, is that okay? Tibio, can I get the desk?
Speaker 7:You don't need Tibio.
Tim / GM:I can
Speaker 7:write them on Books.
Speaker 5:I can write letters and I can make coffee and tea. Can
Speaker 2:I vibe check him?
Tim / GM:The curator? Yeah. Mister House? Yeah.
Tara / Journey:That's his real name.
Tim / GM:You have disadvantage.
Speaker 2:Disadvantage? Yeah. He's fae. Oh. 12.
Tim / GM:Okay. I mean, yeah. He's a Wiley SOB. It's hard to get a read on this guy. It's it seems like he's just trying to make money for the house.
Speaker 2:Okay. It just that just seems very cheap, and we've dealt with a lot of curses.
Tara / Journey:It's because we bought a fuck ton of shit from him today.
Tim / GM:Like, 1,000. Yeah.
Speaker 5:Tibio, do we have enough money? Can I get it?
Speaker 6:Can I get it? It seems a little unnecessary. Oh,
Speaker 5:it's completely unnecessary.
Speaker 7:You don't need Tibio, Bert. I, Snack will sponsor this purchase.
Speaker 5:Oh, Snack.
Speaker 6:Yes. Okay.
Speaker 5:You're my hero.
Speaker 7:I am quite generous. Yes. And we are good friends, and I am your leader.
Speaker 2:You're so benevolent and giving.
Speaker 5:That's all fine.
Speaker 7:Oh, well, you know who would love this is Holly, who I'm buying this
Tim / GM:for. Son of a.
Hannah / Eryn:Thank you. Thank you, Bert. I believe that brings us up to 8, mister House.
Tim / GM:I've kept count Holly Hyacinth.
Tara / Journey:We're just going around and, like, every time we come back up to buy something new, we're wearing a different mustache. Well, well, you got one purchase from Bert, one from Bert Tolle.
Tim / GM:Who is Bert Hollemue? Are there any final purchases among you? Keep in mind, once you leave this floor, you will not be permitted to re enter.
Speaker 7:Oh, we must buy everything, allies.
Tim / GM:Seems that way.
Speaker 7:You are
Speaker 2:so welcome to do that.
Speaker 7:Mister House, I do, want to make a serious speaking conversation with you.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. That's the way to say that.
Tim / GM:To to the rest of you, he gives a very sarcastic look. But Snacky looks very, like, interested to you.
Speaker 7:Mister House, I know that this is not all of your wares, certainly. So something might be, behind the curtain, so to speak. Something more for the richer ones. Holly
Hannah / Eryn:sent me.
Tim / GM:Okay. I will say I will say you can all hear this. You all see this happening. He says, oh, yes. Yes.
Tim / GM:But we must be very quiet. So he he leads Snack to kind of the, like, back of the room where there is a curtain that leads to, like, a storage room. He comes back with handmade wooden clock, like, 10 inches by 16 inches. It's, like, a rather cumbersome clock.
Tara / Journey:Is it like the clock from Beauty and the Beast?
Tim / GM:Yeah. Like that size.
Hannah / Eryn:Yeah. Cogsworth.
Tara / Journey:I can't think of his name.
Tim / GM:He shows it to Snack and says, this is perhaps the most elaborate status symbol we've ever seen. Someone who adorned their home with this. I I don't know if any guest would be able to top it. Such elegance, such extravagance. If I were
Speaker 7:to wear this on my person, would it command respect and dignity?
Tim / GM:Hold on. He has to make a check.
Speaker 2:Flavor Flav.
Tim / GM:Snack make a perception check.
Speaker 6:Snacky. Snack.
Speaker 7:Do I have to roll at disadvantage? No? Okay.
Hannah / Eryn:Snack of love.
Speaker 7:17.
Tim / GM:You do see him, like, smiling when he's giving you this, like, oration. Yes. Yes. Only the most discerning of guests would even be able to, to tell its origins. I see.
Tim / GM:5000 gold pieces.
Speaker 7:5000 gold pieces. Oh, you
Tim / GM:did say that you're a high roller.
Speaker 7:Oh, yes. Of course. I can afford this.
Tim / GM:Yes. Well, that's the price.
Speaker 7:Alright then. How about in one lump sum?
Tim / GM:That would be preferred, I think.
Speaker 5:Are we gonna try to stop him?
Speaker 2:I don't think Snack has that much money.
Speaker 7:Deal. 5,000 gold.
Tara / Journey:Tibia's walking out of the door.
Tim / GM:Just reach into that lamp of yours and
Speaker 2:This seems like a bad idea.
Speaker 7:Yes, of course. Reach into this lamp and buy this item. I I tried to cast the spell of creation.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Give me a self check.
Speaker 5:Yeah. Probably this fae guy probably won't notice.
Tara / Journey:Probably this man made of magic won't notice the magic.
Speaker 5:Yeah. Uh-huh.
Speaker 7:25.
Tim / GM:What the fuck? I mean, he's highly suspicious of you, but he does not know exactly what's going on.
Speaker 7:Okay. Snack makes a giant gold nugget shaped just like a pile of dog shit. It's like Okay. Kinda like that, like Yeah. That's right.
Speaker 7:Just melted pretzels sort of thing,
Tim / GM:you know? Yeah. Yeah. Poop emoji. Yeah.
Tim / GM:Yeah. Okay.
Speaker 7:There we go. I'd say that's worth at least 5,000 gold pieces.
Tim / GM:He, like, he can barely, like, contain the heft of it as you hand it off to him. And he says, where did you find such an artifact?
Speaker 7:I reached deep inside my lamp.
Tim / GM:I see. Well, please give me a moment to just assess its worth here.
Speaker 7:Well, we don't have a lot of time. You know, we've been quite busy.
Tim / GM:Don't be serious. I won't be more than a moment, and he sets it on the counter, and he gets out these, magical instruments to start inspecting it.
Speaker 7:One moment. Sure. Yes. You seem
Tim / GM:like get out these these little spectacles and take a look at it. And then snack. He just, like, lowers the spectacles and looks straight at you. Do you have something you'd like to say?
Speaker 7:Holly said me I'm not sure if I remember to mention that.
Tim / GM:Thanks so much for listening. I'm Tim, your DM and your genie.
Hannah / Eryn:I'm Hannah playing Holly Hyacinth.
Speaker 5:I'm Thomas. I play Engelbert f f Wisherspoon.
Tara / Journey:I'm Tara, and I play Tibio Femur.
Speaker 7:I'm John. I play Snack the Kobalt.
Speaker 2:And I'm Maggie playing Uli.
